I feel so different today. It must be a New Year.

Last night I was so glad to see 2011 go. It felt exactly like it did on New Year’s Eve of 2010, 2009, 2008…

It’s the same “time” of year that we desire to be the type of person that we didn’t become last year. To make the type of changes that we didn’t make last year. But why does this cycle seem to continue year after year after fantastically-too-quick and full-of-letdowns year?

Time is something that we made up to make sense of our finitude. As humans, we are limited. We can’t grasp the idea of infinity and we struggle to think beyond the confines of our minds. So we created time. We made a calendar. We determined that the rising and setting sun and the rhythms of the seasons and harvests determine for us when we are supposed to do things. To wake up. To plant. To eat. To go.

As if humanity is not limited enough to begin with, our quantifying creation limits us even further. We’re late. We don’t have enough time. We can’t get things done. We can’t make things happen.

We can’t dream. When we sleep, it is typically too short to dream. When we are awake, we are too tired and frantic to dream. And if we do dream of something we think, “I’d like to do that but I just don’t know when I’ll do it. There’s just not enough time.”

We made clocks that tick and tock and move aimlessly into a future that doesn’t even exist. We wait for things to pass only to look back and discover what we could have done with our “time.”

What could you do if time didn’t exist? Oh, wait. It doesn’t.